Couples and Money: Setting Financial Goals
In partnership with Siege Media
Let’s face it: Most of us have argued about money with our significant other before.
Maybe your partner made a big purchase without consulting you. Maybe one of you brought credit card debt into the relationship, causing the other to feel resentment. Or maybe you’re always feeling up against the wall when it comes to paying bills, because both you and your partner are spending beyond your means.
Whatever the case, to help improve your relationship and quality of life, it’s important to set financial goals with your partner. Our partners at Siege Media outlined a guide on why financial goals are important and how to set your own.
Talk about your finances
Some couples treat their finances like the boogie monster. They think if they don’t think about their financial worries, then the problem will go away on its own.
Unfortunately, that’s not the case.
If you ignore your financial issues, they’re bound to get worse. In contrast, if you talk about money with your partner and set effective financial goals, you can work toward paying off debt or saving for something important, like a down payment on a home.
Additionally, when you and your partner are on the same page, it prevents conflict. If one person is responsible with money while the other is racking up too many big expenses, it can lead to resentment—which can result in arguments. But when you talk about money, budgeting, and setting spending boundaries for your relationship, it can stop arguments before they start.
Set effective financial goals
You might understand the importance of financial planning, but don’t know where to start. If you haven’t budgeted or tracked your spending before, the process can seem intimidating. However, once you have your financial goals sorted out, you can focus on making incremental progress toward them.
Ultimately, the reason you’re planning financial goals is to improve your life. To this end, first visualize with your partner your ideal life as a couple. Think about where you’d like to live, what your work routine would look like, what you’d like to own, and how you’d like to feel about money.
Maybe your ideal future self feels stress-free about money, lives in a two-story home, and drives a Tesla. These are all valid goals you can work toward, while also ensuring you and your partner are aligned.
With an ideal life in mind, transform that vision into specific goals.
For example, if you want to feel stress-free about money in the future, that might translate to setting goals to pay off your student loan debt and make more money than you spend. If you picture yourself raising a family in the future, that could translate to setting a goal to save for a down payment on a home.
Some common financial goals include:
Paying off debt
Sharing a bank account
Investing in a retirement plan
Creating an emergency fund
Saving for a home
Creating a monthly budget
Saving for a quality car
Building good credit
Start by creating a large list of all your goals with your partner. From there, determine which goals are most important to you. You’ll want to differentiate necessities from luxuries. For example, if you have debts, you might want to prioritize paying them off before you save to buy a Tesla.
Calculate costs
Once you prioritize goals, it’s time to start calculating how much money you’ll need in order to reach each goal. For example, if your first goal is to pay off all debts, you’ll want to check in and add up how much debt you owe overall. If you have a goal to save for a home, search for homes in your ideal location, and write down the average cost of a down payment.
Writing down hard numbers for each goal might feel overwhelming, but it will help you achieve more in the long run. Keep in mind: if saving for a goal tightens your budget too much, you can adjust your time frame for achieving it.
Practice flexibility
Don’t expect you and your partner to suddenly be perfect when it comes to handling money after you’ve calculated your costs and created a budget. For example, you might set lofty goals in your budget, and then spend too much money on eating out the month after. This is why it’s important to practice flexibility.
Setting financial goals is the first step toward financial freedom, but actually adhering to your budget takes effort and discipline. If you spend over budget, track expenses and make a concerted effort to spend less the following month. With some practice, you’ll learn how to properly budget your money.
Practice healthy communication
Part of becoming financially stable with your partner involves practicing healthy communication. When you can be open with one another about your spending habits, wants and needs, then you can learn to navigate toward financial goals together.
To this end, you might also want to make communication goals for your relationship, such as:
Learning to practice active listening
Expressing and letting go of old resentments
Arranging a daily time where you talk with your partner
Learning to express negative feelings in a positive way
The more you practice capable communication habits, the better you will be at adhering to financial goals together.
Financial issues can be a touchy subject in a relationship, but they don’t have to be. If you practice setting healthy financial goals, budgeting, and healthy communication, then you can grow both financially—individually, and as a couple.
Graphic provided by Annuity.org